A Room of One’s Own
At Drymmau Hall we understand that making the decision to leave your own home and move in with us on a permanent basis is a life-changing experience. There is often sadness about what is being left behind, and trepidation about what lies ahead. We know how important the transition is and we try to make it as easy as possible for people to settle with us and become part of our extended family in what is very much a family home.
As in any home, our residents’ individual rooms are the most important of spaces: private and personal, each of our thirty-five rooms at Drymmau Hall (many with en-suites and all with a garden or sea view) is as distinctive as the people who we want to call them theirs. That’s why, prior to moving in with us, we can decorate and furnish a room so that it reflects personal needs and tastes and creates a unique ambience so that people feel not only comfortable, but importantly, content.
R (for the purpose of privacy) is one of the newest members of our extended family here at Drymmau Hall, having moved in with us just two months ago.
This is her story:
R is a ninety-four-year-old woman who is a joy to have with us. She has quickly become part of the family, and forged strong friendship bonds and is already “beating her competitors hollow” at draughts in the weekly meet-up chat and games’ sessions in the coffee shop.
But R readily admits that she was “rock bottom” not that long ago, having lost her husband of seventy years and finding herself very lonely at her home in nearby Skewen. She’d seen the Drymmau Hall advert in the local doctor’s surgery and had thought about making the move into care but had not acted upon it.
But R had a friend called Betty who she knew from church, and Betty had stayed with us at Drymmau once in the past – Skewen is a small place and the best possible way! So, Betty phoned Lizzy Valler (Manager and Owner at Drymmau) and Lizzy went and picked R up and brought her to Drymmau for lunch to give her a taste of things. She stayed two weeks. And her mind was made up!
Of course it was hard to give up her own home, but she was fed up of “eating M&S mini-meals on her own in front of the TV – the evenings were long and empty – the 5pm-10pm loneliness was endless.” There were also health changes to consider. And so, she moved in!
R has room number 6 which she has made very much her own and had painted to her favourite muted tones. The room is light and spacious with views out over the front of the house, across the patio and gardens, and on across Swansea Bay. R brought her TV with her and her own familiar and comfortable reclining chair. Bringing her own furniture, such as her wardrobe and chest of drawers, was “a very big thing” for R, and enabled her to put her personality into a new place.
No 6 is full of memories that R is comforted by: framed photographs of R and her husband, Len, at key wedding anniversaries throughout their long marriage, and beautiful soft toys that R has crafted out of her husband’s familiar old clothes, that she is not ashamed to say she often “cwtches” when she thinks about him.
R’s story has a happy ending. With her cheerful outlook and easy disposition, she has made new friends and is part of the fabric of life here at Drymmau Hall. She is relieved to have replaced the M&S mini-meals by having her “food on the table.” She is also thrilled to having her washing done and to be cared for. R knows now that she “has done the right thing” and that “there is no looking back.”
The nearby Skewen community is still very much part of her life, family members and neighbours coming to visit often. This was central to R’s decision-making process, that her loved ones wouldn’t be far away from her and it would be easy for them to see her. This is something that we at Drymmau Hall echo, in that close ties and a close community, are something that is often so necessary to a smooth transition and a new way of life.
At Drymmau Hall while we understand that a life-changing move is in R’s words “a big thing” she is proof that though she will never let go of the life she had and the memories she holds, she knows that she has a new life with us her that is already interestingly full and exciting and that she has new memories to be made.
If you are considering a care home for yourself or a loved one, we hope R’s story will give you confidence. And of course, if you’d like a taster of what life at Drymmau Hall is like, please don’t hesitate to contact us and arrange a visit. Perhaps you’ll even get to talk to R!